Wednesday, May 19, 2010

p.s.

this last one's for dan.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

brand name

So I have allergies. Some serious allergies. I get them every year now, but they're always worse than the year prior. I remember being a kid, seeing my dad (hearing, him too) sneezing, coughing, gruffing, pissed at the world during marigold season come autumn. Now, and for the last 6-8 years, I comprehend and pass along the pissy attitude to Earth's spring season. Damn pollen.


Not to mention that this whole "moving south" that happened a year+ ago has not adjusted my nose to the more temperate climate. Mike and I traveled, dog in tow, a couple weekends ago to Rhode Island to visit my sister. It was wonderful, and gorgeous. Earth hadn't looked so luscious, so virginal. Just five hours north of us, RI was receiving the glorious blossoms that PA had nearly a month before. This is probably the trip that my allergies decided to boost up.


So, I come home - we're nearly there - and I decide it's time to give in and take the allergy pills. "Pull over at CVS!" Get out, get pills - cheap, store brand. Home. Take one of the "24-hour" tablets and sleep. Scratch that. Try to sleep.


Guess what didn't happen?


So on to work I went that Monday and happened to be sneezing - STILL! (I know...) - and decided I was going to be proactive. After all, the universe responds to what we send out, not necessarily what we desire. How can the sneezing go away without some serious effort on my part? Off to CVS, then the grocery store to find the best, most affordable Claritin package possible. 24 hour coverage = take two just in case. Nothing helped! I'd like to say they're almost gone, but it's not fall yet...


On to the next brand name. Is it convenient that "brand" sounds like "grand?" In either case, that's what brand names do, they want you to believe that they're more worthy, or powerful, or special. They know best because they cost more. They out-do the other generics because they have the trademark to prove it. Isn't it just a name? I could brand myself and I would be no different until I gained a super power. I could earn all the money I want and do with it as pleased and deep down I would still be myself. I would still be Carly.


Some people change as a result of great change. But I don't believe that brands are the great change. They're facades. They're veneers. They're the outside aesthetic and people perceive, but are being deceived by. More recently I've been struggling with this realization in regards to my professional life. What at my job is defining me, and what am I defining? Should they really be different? I support the company, but don't agree to all of their policy. I work hard, but at times it's not enough by the brand's standards. And certainly not enough education. I struggle to BELIEVE that I can make the change I wish, even thought i KNOW it's that simple. So you work it at. You stay proactive. There will be lulls, but on the upswings, create an upside.


There's no other brand that I wish than being myself. And while making mistakes will help me, I'm rather shoot for the mis-nots.